


Picking Your Poison

by KaptainKnuts



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Angst, Betrayal, Crack Relationships, Drinking, F/M, Implied/Referenced Incest, Infidelity, Mild Sexual Content, Out of Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-04
Updated: 2019-01-04
Packaged: 2019-10-04 07:47:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17300651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaptainKnuts/pseuds/KaptainKnuts
Summary: When tensions boil over after Jon's parentage is revealed, a frustrated Daenerys finds comfort from an unlikely source,





	Picking Your Poison

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, so... I kind of dropped the ball on the whole 'posting a one-shot every month thing' pretty quickly didn't I? I just found myself not in a very creative place for the past few months and have only now found the inspiration to write this and work on a few others. Hopefully this is sufficient enough to make up for my absense.

As Dany entered the Hall, Daenerys once again hoped that Tyrion’s plan would work. Sure, it was unorthodox, the circumstances were less than ideal, but it was the only way that everyone would end up happy in her mind. As she took her spot at the head of the table, she saw Jon standing opposite her, flanked by his sister – _cousin_ , she internally corrected, and most surprisingly, her own Hand of the Queen, who seemed to be engaged with an enthralling conversation with the former King in the North.

 

The pair hadn’t spoken to one another since the news that Rhaegar and Lyanna married for love and that Jon was the heir to the Iron Throne. She was left off balance at how quickly they went from sleepless nights of passion to barely acknowledging each other. Tyrion had recommended that she give Jon space to sort out his feelings, giving her time to figure out her feelings as well. She was in equal measures ecstatic that she wasn’t the last of her family but couldn’t help the bitterness she felt at her destiny being taken away from her. Jon had quickly deferred his claim to her, but it had been Tyrion surprisingly enough, that had argued for everyone to not act hastily.

 

Once everyone was situated, the council began to talk about the Long Night. The Wall had fallen shortly before her forces had arrived at Winterfell, and since then, the Army of the Dead had slowly began marching south, forcing many Northern families to abandon their homes and seek shelter further south. Some had ended up at Winterfell, and while it was difficult trying to find lodging for them all, Sansa had somehow managed to organize the keep in such a way that everyone was given refuge.

 

Following this, they discussed the issue of Cersei Lannister. Varys reported that his spies have learned that she had bought the services of the Golden Company, and that she was amassing her forces in the South. She briefly considered going through with her original plan of flying to King’s Landing and burning the Red Keep, but her mind quickly returned to beyond the wall and reminding her of what the more imminent threat was.

 

“We’ll deal with Cersei once a solution presents itself,” Tyrion spoke, exchanging a conspiratorial glance towards Varys, “but there are other matters that I believe have been put off long enough.” Both Sansa and Jon stiffened, both having deduced where the conversation was going to go. “The Great War is upon us and though recent events have made matters more complicated, the issue of the Iron Throne needs to be solved.”

 

The room was locked in silence for several moments, neither side willing to begin uncomfortable conversation. Daenerys felt her heart begin to pound, silently hoping that things went well as she watched Jon and his advisors exchange glances.

 

“There’s nothing to discuss. I don’t want the Iron Throne, it belongs to her Grace.” Daenerys cringed at his use of her formal title, another example of the deterioration of their relationship.

 

“It’s not that simple,” Tyrion began placing his wine on the table and stepping around the table to stand in front of him. “There are those who would see this as a sign of House Targaryen’s weakness and a chance to strengthen their power.” With a glance her direction, Tyrion pressed onward.

 

“I’ve not fought my entire life just to relinquish my birthright.”

 

“I’m not suggesting that, but we need to look at all of our options.”

 

She wanted to argue with him, to tell him that she knew what they would do. She wanted to tell him that She would rule, and that Jon would keep the North loyal. Images came unbidden to her mind, ones of her ruling with Jon by her side, of her and Jon lying in bed together, and finally of a son that had his face and her hair and eyes. Prior to finding out that Jon was her nephew, she would’ve believed this vision as projections of the future, instead her mind was plagued with doubt.

 

“Go on then.”

 

She saw the relief visibly wash through her Hand, before finally speaking up. “Well, since we already established that seceding to Lord Snow is not an option, our best course of action is for you two to marry.”

 

Many at the table were caught off-guard by Tyrion’s suggestion, and though many seemed uncomfortable with the idea, few seemed willing to speak out.

 

“Can we have the room please?” she asked, hoping to keep the details of this conversation between Tyrion, Varys, Jon, and herself. Slowly, all the others trickled out of the room until it was just the four of them. The silence was stifling, Jon stood silent, his face a stoic mask, Tyrion seemed hesitant and she herself started to feel her nerves getting the better of her.

 

“I know this is a lot to take in Jon, but it is our duty to do what’s best for the realm. And that is the two of you. Together.”

 

“I never wanted any of this - ”

 

“I understand that, but we have a duty to do what’s best for the realm, and that I believe, if the two of you. Together.”

 

Jon opened his mouth like he was going to reply but was cut off by Varys before he could.

 

“There’s also the small matter of secession that needs to be dealt with.”

 

Daenerys braced herself for another extremely uncomfortable conversation. For the thousandth time, she wished that fate hadn’t been cruel and that she could conceive her own heirs. But the fates were never that kind to her family.

 

“The best plan would be to either adopt the practices of the Night’s Watch or the Ironborn and have a vote when the time arises.”

 

“Perhaps I wasn’t clear earlier Lord Tyrion. I did not free Slaver’s Bay and return to claim my family’s right only for my family to lose it.” She saw a look cross Jon’s face, not a hostile or disgusted one, but one she couldn’t identify before he schooled his expression back to a thoughtful one. “What else is there?”

 

“Well,” began Tyrion hoping to diffuse the tension. “If you and Jon Snow are to be married than it would make sense to name one of his … _siblings_ as your heir.” Daenerys was prepared to speak up once again and ask for some other solution when Varys beat her to it.

 

“There is a much easier solution you know?” Everyone looked at him expectantly, as the eunuch slowly made his way around the table to stand in front of her and Jon. “The Queen might not be able to conceive an heir, but our future King still can.”

 

Daenerys gasped, she couldn’t stop the noise from escaping her mouth when she realized what he was implying. Though Jon couldn’t create and heir from her, he could create it elsewhere. She wanted to berate Varys, punish him for even suggesting such a thing, but even though the thought of Jon with another woman stabbed at her heat in a way that she wasn’t entirely comfortable examining quiet yet, she realized that Varys was right. If she wanted to both have Jon and an heir, this was the only real way to do it.

 

“Once the two of you are married, it would be a simple matter to legitimize-”

 

“No.”

 

The sudden intrusion of Jon’s voice caught her off-guard, his outburst the first he had spoken in some time. Looking at him, his face was tight in barely controlled rage, his eyes burning with dragon fire as he glared at Varys.

 

“I won’t do this,” he said, his eyes traveling to her and even though there was a hint of sorrow hidden behind his grey eyes, they burned with betrayal and hurt. “Any of this”, and before any of them could respond, he turned and quickly left the room, the sound of the door slamming as he left cutting through the silence his outburst left.

Several hours had passed and Daenerys’ anger had yet to abate. Jon Snow angry and sudden departure from their meeting had caused a whirlwind of events that only seemed to stoke her own fury. Shortly after he had left, Davos and Sansa entered the room and demanded to know what had happened that had angered Jon so much. Though she knew that they had a right to know, the shock of Jon leaving mixed with their insistent questioning only furthered her annoyance, ending in her ousting them from the room before storming off herself.

 

Though she was angry, she felt betrayed more than anything else. She had expected and hoped that Jon would be receptive to the idea, that he would want to be with her and rule beside her. It now appears that she was mistaken, her thoughts stoking her anger as she continued to pace inside her quarters.

 

Deciding that some flying with Drogon would help her calm down, she grabbed her heavy cloak and stormed from her chambers, only to bump into maybe the last person she wanted to see.

 

“Ahh, the Dragon Queen herself.”

 

Before her stood Jaime Lannister, the man who killed her father. She held back her instincts to tell him off with a biting comeback and instead leveled him with a glare, in the hopes that he would leave her alone.

 

“Ser Jaime,” she deadpanned, “What brings you to this part of the keep?”

 

“I was just leaving my chambers,” he said gesturing to the door next to him with his golden hand, “ I wanted to have a word with the Lord Snow about battle plans, but it seems that he has made himself scarce.” His tone was incredibly sarcastic, and though she assumed that it was a poor attempt to get a rise out of her, she was unable to prevent the ache in her chest at the thought that Jon had seemingly hid himself away because of the discussion earlier.

 

“Lord Snow was not agreeable to the solution that your brother and I presented for the realm.”

 

“A lover’s quarrel then,” he said with a barely contained smirk, which only proved to annoy her further.

 

“I’ve lived much of my life believing that I had no family outside of my brother. When he died I was forced to accept that I would be alone in the world, and now not only have I learned that I do have family left in the world, but that that person now wants nothing to do with me,” she shouted at Jaime, having taken a step forward until she was nearly chest-to-chest with him, before turning to leave.

 

“My greatest regret is that I wasn’t able to save your mother or brother.” His words stopped her in her tracks. Daenerys quickly turned around and was shocked at the solemn look that haunted the Kingslayer’s eyes. “Rhaegar was one of the finest men that I ever met. I knew without a doubt that he would’ve been the greatest king to ever rule the Seven Kingdoms. Your mother on the other hand, was one of the kindest souls that I ever met. Every night I had to stand by and listen as your father did unspeakable things to her. Not a day goes by that I don’t wish I was there to protect them or acted sooner.”

 

Daenerys studied his face, but no matter how hard she tried, she found no falsehood in Jaime’s eyes. All her life, she had held him chiefly to blame for the downfall of her family. Even when she had learned what a monster her father truly was, she still despised him and his family for what they did to hers.

Now she could see that the man before her, was one filled with regret and self-loathing. Even though deep down she would never forgive or forget what he had done, a small part of her did feel for the older man. She came to the realization that Jaime was one of the only people left alive who had truly known her mother and brother.

 

“You knew my brother and mother?”

 

He seemed taken aback by her question, his eyes still a little weary of her, even as he answered. “Maybe not as well as others had, but yes…I knew them.”

 

She felt a little bit of hope rise in her chest. Jaime was her best chance to learn what they were really like and was her connection to the life that she had never known, and she was eager to claim what little knowledge she could.

 

“Could you tell me about them?”

 

Jaime observed her for one agonizing moment before nodding his head. She quickly moved passed him, pushing open the door to his chamber, leaving him stunned before he finally gained his wits an followed her inside, the shutting of the door breaking the still heavy and tense silence. Spotting a table on the opposite wall, she proceeded to sit down and poor herself a drink, soon joined by Jaime who too poured himself some wine.

 

How long the two of them sat there she didn’t know. She figured it had to have been at least an hour, the pair having fallen deep into their cups as Jaime regaled her with anecdotes of his time serving her family. She eventually joined the conversation, talking about her journey from Pentos to Meereen and finally to Westeros. The drink loosened her tongue as she talked about Jon while Jaime talked about his family. Despite all of this, the conversation always came back to Rhaegar.

 

“Your brother was one of the most talented people I’ve ever met. Not only was he good with a blade, but he was good with his voice. There were many times when he would sing as we sparred. Even then he still won more times than I’d care to admit.”

 

Daenerys chuckled, something she would usually admonish herself for, but she couldn’t find it in herself to care. Learning about her family had warmed her insides almost as much as the wine she had consumed. She felt cheerful for the first time in weeks and it was all thanks to Jaime Lannister. The more he talked, the more her hatred and vitriol melted and was replaced with gratitude. As time went on, she found herself captivated by his words, un consciously moving closer to him. She stared unblinkingly at her drinking partner, unable to prevent her mind from thinking about how handsome he was.

 

 “I’m not even sure if Prince Rhaegar even knew the effect he had-”

 

His words were cut off when Daenerys closed the distance between them and captured his lips in a heated kiss. She felt him stiffen before her, opening her eyes momentarily to peer into his own. She watched as numerous emotions passed his eyes, from surprise to anger, to confusion until she saw something that must’ve been either acceptance or acceptance. She knew the man before her was just as lost as she was. Maybe they could be lost together.

 

 In the next moment, Jaime’s eyes drifted shut, arms moving to cage her in, just as Daenerys sprang from her chair and placed herself in his lap. Their lips became frenzied, one arm wrapping around her lower back, the cool metal of his fake hand grazing her exposed back sending shivers down her spine, while the other found purchase on her bottom. Hers weren’t idle either, fingers combing through his hair s she grinded down on him shamelessly, stirring a deep arousing moan from her chest, making her quake in anticipation.

 

She felt both of his arms tighten as Jaime lifted her from his lap and placed her on the table in front of them. Using his gold hand to swipe away the food and drink from the table, making room for them as he eased them down on top of it. She shivered as she felt the remnants of the undrunk wine pool around her but couldn’t dwell on it much as Jaime reached up to her neck line and pulled it down, exposing her breasts to her exploring mouth. She moaned and arched her back once his lips landed there, wrapping one leg around his waist to pull him in and increase the friction.

 

As he nipped at her breasts, she felt Jaime’s prosthetic hand travel up beside her head, as his good hand went south to hastily undo his breaches. The only warning she got of what was to come was the feel of him moving her small clothes out of the way, before he finally buried himself inside her to the root, the last of her high thoughts ending as the two fell into their passion.

The intrusion of the harsh early morning sunlight that woke Daenerys from her fitful sleep. She forced her eyes to remain shut, hopeful that it would enough to lull her brain back into unconsciousness, but her other senses betrayed her.

 

The first thing she became aware of was the sounds of guards moving about outside her room, the clinking of their armor cutting through the silence. As she shifted into a comfortable position, she noticed the linens felt different against her skin. At the same moment, she felt a warm madd behind her, meaning that she didn’t go to bed alone. Finally, she tried to slow her breathing through her nose and when she did, she was met not by the scent of a certain northern bastard, but of a different one that was vaguely familiar. It almost smelled like…

She suddenly sat up in the bed, uncaring about how exposed she was, her mind replaying flashes of what had transpired the night before. She looked by her at her bedmate, praying that she was somehow mistaken. She wasn’t so lucky.

 

Behind her, she saw the sleeping form of one Jaime Lannister, the man who killed her father, the man with whom she’d obviously shared her bed with. Shame flooded her heart, her anger at Jon having obviously gotten the better of her. It was the only reason she could find for falling into bed with the man who was partially responsible for the fall of her family. Glancing at a nearby table, she saw the wine that had spilled everywhere had surely played an important role as well.

 

Her treacherous mind wouldn’t let up as even more flashes from the previous night entered her mind. Of how they both found their release on the table before she was quickly undressed and tossed onto the bed. How one moment she went from riding him, the next he was thrusting from behind her, the strength of him forcing her flat on the bed, and then him pleasuring her with his mouth before she returned the favor. More images of what seemed like hours of pleasure flooded back to her, only serving to further increase the shame she felt inside.

 

As quietly and quickly as she dared, she extradited herself from the bed and began gathering her garments, hopeful that she could make it back to her chambers without being noticed. With her dress hastily thrown on, obvious that it was thrown on in haste, yet too difficult to put on herself, she gave one last glance at the Kingslayer, who hadn’t even stirred in her rush, and left his chambers.

 

Thankfully, the path back to her chambers was bereft of patrolling guards and other obstacles. Her thoughts ran from her as she walked in silence. How had she allowed this to happen? It had all started as too people trying to let go of the past and him telling her stories of her brother, how could she end up laying with him.

 

Her thoughts were interrupted when she rounded the last corner to her chambers, only to find Jon Snow standing outside her door. She quickly through her body back around the corner and prayed that he didn’t see her in such a state. He didn’t say anything, nor did the sound of footsteps announce his approach, so she hoped that he would leave soon.

 

“Ahh. It’s it the proud Northern Lord who stormed away from his Queen. Come to apologize?”

 

She suppressed the groan at the arrival of Tyrion’s voice. All she wanted was to get to her chambers and pretend that the last 12 hours never happened.

 

“Apologize, no. I wish to explain myself for my outburst yesterday.”

 

“I hope you know that the Queen was livid when you left. Raving about how you were abandoning your duty, being selfish, betraying your family, among other things.”

 

She desperately wanted to peer around the corner and see watch their interaction, but the fear of being discovered kept her in hiding.

 

“I assure you that my intentions were anything but selfish.”

 

“I fail to see how my lord.”

 

Several seconds of silence fell in the hall once again, the urge to peer around the corner once again threatening to take control. Her body was unconsciously leaning into the corridor when Jon’s voice startled her enough to jump back.

 

“All my life, no matter what I accomplished, all I was to anybody was a bastard. Even as Lord Commander and King of the North, they respected me and followed me, but all most people will ever see me as is a bastard. No one should have to go through that, especially Daenerys and especially a child.”

 

Daenerys vaguely heard Tyrion give some platitude about how it didn’t matter what others thought, but Daenerys barely heard him. Instead, her mind focused on Jon’s words and the intensity and conviction behind them. Of course, Jon’s reasons for his refusal of their plan and his immediate exit were because he was worried about her honor and the honor of the child and not because he didn’t care for her. She cursed herself for not talking to Jon about it and instead jumping to conclusions.

 

She quickly covered her mouth to suppress her gasp as the guilt of what she had done had finally caught up with her. She was thankful that the pair down the hall were walking away, too engrossed in their conversation to hear her outburst, but her mind could only focus on one thing.

 

She’d slept with Jaime Lannister. She’d let her emotions get the better of her and slept with the man who killed crippled Bran. She’d fucked the man who killed her father. She started to feel sick, so Daenerys dashed as quickly as she could the rest of the way to her chambers, thousands of thoughts raced through her mind, yet one kept returning to the forefront.

 

_What have I done?_

**Author's Note:**

> This story was originally supposed to be a part of a series that detailed Jon and Dany falling out. Dany was going to hook-up with Jaime while Jon would be coerced into sleeping with Cersei, before they would eventually get back together. I ended up not liking the idea, but plan to release the second part as a separate story. I hope to have that posted before Season 8 comes out.


End file.
